Some Days Just Suck
Some days just suck. You know? And it's always almost impossible to figure out exactly why. Going to bed at 11:30 and waking up at 4:30 definitely didn't help. Driving for well over an hour (again) before we even got to take one step on the trail didn't help. Comparing notes with other hikers again and having to explain again why we were pulling up in a car didn't help. Knowing most of today was going to be spent going downhill (my least favorite) in very high temperature didn't help either.
But the big stinking, day-destroying, mind-breaking cherry on top was my right shoulder strap. It started early and boy did it crank up quickly. For whatever reason my left one was totally fine, while my right one was digging into my trap with a level of pain and irritation that had me wishing for the blisters back instead.
As I walked I tried making all kinds of adjustments. I became this bizarre and annoying creature, shuffling along with both trekking poles in one hand while the other pulled on countless different strap combinations, all the while grunting along from the pain but more from the frustration. And this went on for miles.
It was at this point that my parents started offering suggestions which is of course EXACTLY what I wanted. Ok, that's being a bit harsh because they were truly trying to help and only had my well-being in mind, but if you've ever been in this state of frustration you know how I was feeling. You don't want anyone to talk to you, let alone try to help, no matter how genuine the offer is.
This is terrible, but one of the first questions my mom asked was if I tried adjusting the straps above the shoulder that pulled the pack forward. This was actually a very legit suggestion, and had successfully helped alleviate some trap pressure in the past. It took more self-control than I'd like to admit from snapping back and sarcastically replying that "Oh no, I HADN'T tried the ONE thing that helped the last time I had this issue." Instead I settled for a defeated and mumbling, "mhmm" (translation: yes).
It was shortly after this that I resigned myself to the fact that the issue was not going to get fixed for the rest of the day. There was a moment I just decided it wasn't.
In my head I asked myself, "What are you going to do? Go back?" No. "well are you gonna just chuck it over the cliff?" Fantasize doing just that for a second, but ultimately no. "Okay then, figure out a way to be okay with it."
SIDE NOTE: This kind of internal dialogue seems to happen a lot on the trail. Finding ways to turn it from this negative to a positive is what it's all about.
So I tried to do just that. For me what always helps is keeping things in perspective. I used to have conversations with my good friend Rob Headley back at UCLA about the power of perspective in your life, and I tried to channel all of that again. What immediately came to mind is a Frontline documentary watched, one frame in particular. A man from a war torn country is sitting in a chair surrounded by a bunch of rubble. The camera pans out and the viewer learns that he is surrounded by one and a half walls and some more assorted destroyed furniture. The viewer also learns that hits is EVERYTHING that his man has left. EVERYTHING.
When I think of perspective all of this flashes through my mind. That same internal voice asks if this man would trade circumstances with me. In a heartbeat.
So my shoulder strap was hurting as I hiked through beautiful terrain with both of my healthy and fit parents. I thought my day sucked at one point? Compared to what?!
So I cinched up all straps almost as tight as they could go and resolved to flip my mindset for the rest of the day. (This little cinch everything up as tight as possible maneuver did relieve that shoulder pain, BTW).
The rest of the day proved to be yet another grand adventure. I was trying a new pair (and style0 of shoes (zero-drop) so I had to teach myself my new stride adjustments. For a while this alone demanded almost all my attention. We were also descending from the Laguna mountain range so the day was filled with breathtaking views of the desert floor. As we approached the bottom the temperature climbed up to 100 degrees, forcing us to stick together, pick each other up mentally, and take breaks when we needed to. A few of these breaks were interrupted by jets tearing through the sky at our elevation, lower and closer than I've seen in a long time. At one point it even solicited an unexpected yell of childlike excitement for me and my adrenaline was jamming for the following mile.
After we finished the punishingly hot 2 mile walk across the desert floor and were done for the day, we were hot, dirty, thirsty, and sore. And I was so proud of each and every one of us, myself included. We conquered the miles, elements, and our minds for the day and that's all you can do.
Sure it can be easy to say some days just suck, but do they ever really have to?
